Gunhild Archer, counselor

I have been thinking a lot about my offers lately, and why it seems like other coaches make thousands and thousands in sales each day. It’s hard to witness how much people need what I have to offer without being asked to help. Not succeeding in making a proper living off of what I do frustrates me too. In the last week I have been wrecking my brain, trying to figure out what I’m not doing right, or if there is something I’m not doing that I could be doing.

I’ve been reading the book “Find Your Why”, and naturally I thought to myself: “Maybe I’m not clear on why I do what I do – maybe my offering is vague and thus not attracting the right people?”. What is my why? Well…

I want you to learn what it feels like to be your own strongest advocate. I want you to know how to powerfully show up for yourself because it puts you in a position where you can take charge and choose the life experiences you want. I want that for you.

I’m not sure if “becoming your own strongest advocate” is something people want. Maybe I’m just bad at selling it? I keep having a voice inside my head thinking it is more alluring to jump on a course that promises a specific outcome. I’m trying to sell reality, you know…”Real” work which includes the nitty gritty, uncertainty, picking yourself up by the bootstraps, trial and error, having moments of cringe and shame AND the mind blowing realizations, the small aha-moments, and the life changing perspective shifts that can only occur by being in a long term container… All of that! Although that’s life, it seems like people would rather jump on the promise of a daily 10k revenue (hello cash flow, #hot-melting-face-emoji, #wetemoji, #eggplantemoji (that’s the big dick energy-emoji)!). I don’t feel like that’s a promise I can make though. In all honesty, I don’t even want to. I want you to be comfortable being in reality, and reality is uncertain. In my experiences there are no guarantees. That being said, you can control how you show up for yourself. Learning how to be your own advocate will serve you throughout your entire life.

I don’t think I will ever sell a promised outcome. I also don’t want to gain views and likes by oppose something (opposing or critiquing is rampant lately). I wish I bought into a system like Human Design, astrology, or manifestation rituals. I wish I could make feel-good promises based on following a system or a set of rules. When I see Human Design and manifestation posts, I see an invitation to give my power away. I see an invitation to rely on the system rather than my own truth. I’m not saying the systems aren’t valuable, that they should be discarded, or that they don’t hold truth. I just don’t like the concept of placing your authority in something outside yourself.

What happens when the system can’t validate your truth? I imagine you will try to fit yourself into the system. I know I spent years doing that. Abandoning my truth for the sake of fitting in. “The system told me to do wait for invitation or else I won’t experience success. I really want the outcome promised by the system, so I’m going to ignore every single nudge I have to take action.”

I don’t want you to forsake yourself. I want you to feel, trust and live according to your authority.

I believe you find what’s correct for you allowing yourself to go through the motions, the turmoil, the inner conflict between your thoughts and feelings. Feel it, understand it, validate it, take correct action. One of my biggest take-aways from Human design is that we, by design, function differently. If your practitioner isn’t focused on deciphering what’s correct for YOU, you risk living a life that’s not yours. There is no success in that.

In my experience, you feel whole as a result of making choices that are correct for YOU.

Working with me means not leaving yourself for the sake of remaining connected. It means getting to know and respect your feelings and needs so that you don’t violate yourself by overstepping them. It means learning to bear the discomfort of potential rejection and loss that might follow from being in touch with your authority (and choosing your truth).

I want you to feel completely safe and secure, fully supported, and championed, by yourself. Of course, I also want you to have everything you desire, but never at the expense of your integrity. Not ever.